I Freaked Out Thinking People Didn't Love Me, I Watched Closely As The You I Knew Forgot Me.

kelllllogss (4:51:09 PM): don't think this is sketchy.. but.
L0VEmeHARDCORE x (4:51:15 PM): ...
kelllllogss (4:51:23 PM): i had a dream about you and nick eloping.
L0VEmeHARDCORE x (4:51:29 PM): lmfao!
kelllllogss (4:56:19 PM): you went to his house ( i drove you) and you were like "nicholas i love you. please marry me please" and he kissed you and you guys got in the car and we went to las vages ( really fast) and elvis married you two and then you had a reception party and evferyone was there and my dad and yer mom hooked up and got married ( SCARY ) and it was month later and we were at the wedding (your mom my dad) and start screaming crying and you and nick look at me and yer like "what" and i was like i dont wanna be his sister-ish in-law thing and you started laughing and he laughed and i cried and then i woke up. [:

^that would be why I love my best friend.

I was just reading all the blogs I have missed, and it seems like everyone's so down lately, including me. Is Lindsey right? Is there something in the air?
One of my problems is I internalize other peoples problems, and I'll sit and try to think about how I can subtly fix them without getting into the person's life. But it always pisses people off.

I got into the faculty choreography piece that I wanted. It's Susan's piece and we found out today that it's about a myth of Neptune from the Aeneid. It's really cool. We learned part of it in modern class so I was ahead of the kids who had ballet today. Yay.

I hate when people bitch about me in their blogs and think I won't know it's me. It's like duh, I'm not stupid. If I'm going to bitch about people I let them know and I use their name. So you should have the guts to also.

Let's get one thing straight.
No matter what I've said in previous blogs, I don't hate Nick.
I don't have the ability to hate anyone.

My mommy just gave me salad, yummmm.

Ohboy, lets talk about Rory.
I've never felt as uncomfortable being around one of my ex's as I do around him.
I don't even know why.
He kept touching me again today and I finally yelled at him for it and he laughed.
He doesn't get that I'm fucking serious.

I colored my Hello Kitty (THAT STUPID 7 YEAR OLD OBSESSION ;]) coloring book during period 4, lunch, and period 5 today. Stress relieverrrrrr.

I also took my ADHD meds for the first time today. I didn't see a big difference..

I'm starting to become a fan of The Hush Sound. I had listened to some stuff before but I'm listening to more now. Yay. They're goood.

This is the first night I haven't had bad anxiety in three nights, and the first night I haven't had any anxiety in like a week.
Stupid anxiety came back after like three months.
Coincidentally after Nick basically told me to fuck off.
No, it's not coincidence. When I used to get anxious even a little bit I'd talk to him about it or just talk to him in general, and I'd be fine. It probably pissed him fucking off but it helped me.

Well, I have to go write out my ECA dance, make a math midterm study guide, shower, and color Hello Kitty.
Sounds fun, ay?

xoxo<3>