I Can't Explain, I Need To Be Alone.

I woke up this morning with a killer headache and nausea.
I don't know if it was because of lack of sleep or I have some bug.
After 4 more hours of sleep it's mostly just the headache now.

I feel generally better after talking to Tyler last night.
He was actually able to make me sincerely laugh.
I dunno though, things get worse at night, so I'll have to wait and see.
At least I know he's there if I truly need him.

I hate when people text and they're like "Where are you?"
Cause I feel guilty saying "I'm sick."
Even thought I haven't missed a day since October.
I just, I don't know, feel bad?

I know I can't break down now.
I have so much coming up.
Florida, Midterms, etc.
And that makes everything harder.
Cause it's not like I choose to go into depression.
I don't say "I feel like breaking down today."
It just happens. And I can feel it starting.
I don't want to go to dance, I don't want to go to ECA.
I can deal with school, but for how long?
And when I realize how much I have to worry about, it gets me back to everything I talk to Tyler about.
And then I feel oh so guilty for bother Ty with my problems.
But he always helps, and he knows how to.
And he knows a lot about one of my biggest problems right now, because that's his friend.
And Tyler, if you're reading this? And you don't want me bothering you with my issues?
Tell me man, I'll understand completely.

I guess I'm done for now. I want to go lay back down.
Uggggggggghhhhhhhh.

xoxo<3